Baltic Sea Between Helsinki and Stockholm, March 11th to 13th 2018 (and various other dates)
The Stockholm cruise is somewhat an institution
among the Finns. And Swedes, too. The previous call it ruotsinlaiva (Ship to
Sweden) and the latter finlandsfärja (Ferry to Finland). Especially in the
ruotsinlautta case, one is supposed to overeat at the buffet, drink the cheap
booze, party in the overtly colourfully lighted disco, including at least some
dance steps to the 80's hits played by a cheesy cover band, sing some karaoke with deepest of feelings, buy some more cheap
booze from the tax free and pass out in someone else's cabin. All this wearing
glitter decorated tops and polyester shirts, possibly changing wearer during
the night.
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| Sunsets are the only reason to go outside during the winter, in the summertime there are additional bars on decks |
Kids are supposed to, according to their ages,
pass out early by sugar rush caused by the cheap candies bought from the tax
free, cry in terror of their parents behavior or scheme their way to the very first sip of
alcoholic beverages. In the morning, parents are supposed to throw up and take
the kids to Gröna Lund amusement park, where the kids throw up and then it's
time to go back to the ship and do it all over again.
Even though the EU has ruined the really cheap
booze part and there are occasionally actually good bands performing, you can still live this dream. Anyhow, there are other options.
Like, here I am, as I write, relaxed, having a sip of sparkling wine (not the
very cheapest, I might add), well fed, surrounded by pretty much sober families.
The scenery passes by peacefully and if it was summer, I could even see it. A
success!
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| Staring at the scenery |
There are two ferry companies, Viking Line and
Tallink Silja, of which Silja is traditionally regarded a tad classier but is
accordingly more expensive. I've traveled both, found the differences quite
small and ended up using Viking Line, because of the prices and better location
of the harbor in Stockholm.
The main rule is to travel starting
Sunday–Wednesday. Thus you avoid the most drunk weekdays of Friday and Saturday
on board. Also, the trips are cheaper. Following ads, or even by joining
Viking Club, you get quite favorable special prices, starting from a few
euros. Offers don't happen between start of June till mid August, though,
because the ships have more than enough customers in families with vacationing school kids then. So go before /
after. By answering the company's email questionnaires and buying enough stuff
from the tax free, you might get an offer for another cruise, and then the same happens again and all of a
sudden you're in the Viking Loop. I should now, I traveled eight times last
year.
Why? you ask. WHY ON EARTH??!!!! you might
even put it. Well, the biggest reason is obviously Stockholm, but more on that in
another posting.
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| The welcoming port of Stockholm |
When in middle of travels, I need my
methadone, and a short trip abroad, anywhere abroad, is just that. Also, for some
reason, I sleep very well in ships – especially in a tad more luxurious two
persons cabin, equipped with a two persons soft bed, which is just large enough
for one. The humming of motors gives me such a good sleep. Furthermore, I find
the few hours in open sea, when internet doesn't really work, very relaxing. Viking
Line has lately very kindly eased the non-internetting, by making the users
renew the connection once in an hour and changing the password every day. Rather
than going to info to check the new password in one's pajama's, it's so very
alluring to just give up and read a book. Of course, it's also quite relaxing not to be
able to actually go anywhere, without serious risk of drowning.
I mentioned the soft beds of a tad more finer
cabins. Let's go deeper in that. Never settle with the cheapest option of
windowless cabin. The stereotype of drunken Scandinavians is based on reality,
and you might spend some time in your cabin, trying to avoid them. Or non-internetting. In the cheapest cabins, you'll have a good chance having one or eight of them as neighbors, too, or even more horrific teenage versions. Quite loud. So,
upgrade at least to a cabin with a window, it really is not that expensive. The
cabins are quite small and it's not exaggerating to have one of four persons
all to yourself. The mentioned lux but still affordable cabins are available in
the ship Mariella only.
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| The cheapest cabin with a window option on the left, a tad more expensive on the right. Humans added for scale. |
In my childhood I dreamed of the overwhelming
buffet of the ship, pouring with shrimps and chocolate sauce, my favourites at the time.
Respectively. Nowadays I sport a tad more developed taste, but the food still
is ok. The wine is included in the reasonablish whole deal price, which drives people to
drink too much and buy scarves they can't afford, but overall the ambience is
quite civilized in the restaurant. There are other restaurants on board, too,
but let's just say that it helps to be a carnivore. With a vegan friend of
mine, with whom I started my career as cruise ship regular, we usually buy
fancy food in advance and do not leave the cabin. A very viable option, that
one, too.
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| Example of a moderate picnic in the cabin with food oriented friends |
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| The buffet includes food, too |
The tax free shop looks innocent enough and
you'll walk in like "oh, there's nothing I'd have to buy from here, I'll just
stroll to the candy shelf and buy me a chocolate bar", but be warned:
amongst all the usual nothing special stuff there might be lurking something
you just feel compulsed to buy. Like a Balmuir scarf just your colour, too
expensive, last one left. Just a random example. For those believing in the almighty power of
Elizabeth Arden's 8 hour lip balm in curing dry lips, leper and broken limbs;
it's sold here very affordable. FYI: In Finland the stuff is known as Ellun
ihmerasva (Elsie's miracle cream) and it has a cult following.
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| Defs not a shopping trip |
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